the ‘narcissist’
or whatever similar creature
you perceive and experience negatively
and / or feel victimized by
and / or want revenge upon
for all they’ve ‘done’ to ‘you’
(but more accurately, and firstly, and in excess — to themselves)
never ‘gets away with it’
they are living 24-7 in that torturous internal prison that ‘makes’ them do the ‘incomprehensible’
and what you experienced
as horrific as it was
while being caught in that twisted web that you did in fact sign up for
(at the deepest level, of course, to access your own salvation by erecting yourself even further)
was only the echo
the overflow
a tiny portion of
a much larger war going on
you were just a casualty
as it were
a necessary
and impersonal
canvas to bleed upon
which was your ‘job’
(obviously)
to take what was given
at the hands of the sickest
and
being caught in that crossfire
of another’s externalized internal war
while gross and seemingly ‘unforgivable’
(but we don’t need to ‘forgive’ in these parts, remember?)
there is nothing you could do
or orchestrate to have done to them
that would be ‘worse’ than what they are already experiencing
and doing to themselves
ab-so-lute-ly nothing
and how you were affected by their split from who they are
(but even more accurately — by how you split from yourself in order to ‘withstand’ it)
is so inconsequential
not just because they don’t care
but because the level of pain
disconnection
confusion and density
that they habitually operate from
leaves zero room
to consider you
(or anyone else for that matter)
beyond their own
incessant need
to meet their needs
that are never met
because no matter what they do
and no matter how hard they try
they cannot quell
that emptiness
that repeatedly swallows them whole
△
Download 'The Narcissist (A Compilation)’: 11 Crisp Mandyland Essays + 80 Bangin' Mandy Bites on the one you love to hate.
This is by far my favourite collection and topic of exploration, and I guarantee you won't get a fresher take on the subject than this.
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